A RIGHT BOOB, TITTLE TATTLE, OR MY CANCER ‘JOURNEY’

Just before Christmas, after a routine Mammogram, a repeat performance, and 8 biopsies, the
Consultant Radiologist, with a bedside manner of Dracula, said “‘I’m nearly 100% sure its Cancer”. No
gentle lead-up or hand-holding….. Once it was confirmed and my head had stopped spinning, I
considered whether to mention it to my friends and family. I’m so glad I did.

I now know so many currently going through cancer, of various types, and so many more who have
had it in the past – even 25 years ago. Nothing takes away the grief for those who have lost friends
and family to this disease. But it’s a sobering thought that 1 in 7 women will get breast cancer, and
cancer of any type will affect 1 in 2. Breast cancer is now one of the most treatable – I had no lumps
or other symptoms, and if I had not had the routine check-up (requested, as I’m over 70), it might
have been another year or more before I noticed anything.

So, January began with an MRI Scan to see the scale of things. Before this, I needed a blood test.
Clearly the Malbec, at the White Lion the night before, was not sufficient, and I was dehydrated.
Neither the poor Nurse, nor the dashing Paramedic, could find a vein. As he took my hand and
crouched down, I couldn’t help but note that it was a long time since a man knelt before me and held
my hand – perhaps it was unwise to crack a joke while he was armed with the needle. Thankfully, a
few days later, filled with water instead of wine, the test was successful.
Next came a trip to Poole, for the MRI Scan, where they have state-of-the-art equipment. Lying on
my front, with my face (and frontage) held gently in ‘funnels’. I couldn’t see anything, except via a
small mirror. I’m warned that it will be noisy, so what music would I like on the head-phones? First
thought – “Simon and Garfunkel”. So, there I lay, motionless, to the uplifting strains of “Hello
Darkness my Old Friend”.

The following week, I found out the options – a partial operation – Therapeutic Mammoplasty, or a
Mastectomy. The first one would leave me with some womanly asset, but I would need Radiotherapy
and possibly Chemo, and the Mastectomy is clearly the full whammy (on one side). I opted for this.
Now I wait for the results, and keep my fingers crossed that I’ll be cancer-free though slightly lop
sided. At least future Mammograms will only be half as uncomfortable, and I have an instant weight
loss!

So, I want to thank all those – male and female – who have shared their memories, their own
experiences, and offered support and lots of hugs! To others, I hope this will chivvy anyone
reluctant to go for a routine check-up. And thirdly, I’m aiming to continue to see the funny side of
things wherever possible!

Part 2:
Well, I’ve had the op, or lop….. and I’m on the road to recovery. One problem is comfort – underwear
rides up, the ‘softie’ prosthetic slides down, or the stitching is itchy. My lovely partner has started
using ‘traffic cop’ sign language – a “slow down” sign now means I’ve gone up on the false side, and
need to come down a bit, and vice versa.
The nurses warned that bodily liquid will fill any gaps. Thus, it feels as though a hot water bottle is
strapped to my chest – if I move too fast, it wobbles from side to side with a slightly alarming ‘wave’
sensation. To remove the oestrogen from my body, I have hormone treatment. The tiny little yellow
tablet looks sweet, but it should have a ‘nasty-face’ emoji, as it’s likely to bring on all the menopause
symptoms again (oh joy!), and has already started to thin my hair. I’ll also be more susceptible to
breaking something if I fall (no, not the Malbec…!). So a bone scan is arranged.
Next step was to find out the results. “Unfortunately…” began the Consultant. Oh dear. So, I have to
have another operation, to remove the lymph nodes under my arm. After that, there’s a chance I
might need Chemo. My lovely, bald, partner is sympathetic – “At least we can be bald together”. One
bright note was when the MacMillan nurse recommended ASDA, for suitable underwear! Who
knew?! So, with a slight whinge from the follically-challenged one, we drove home via Yeovil, and
success – such an amazing feeling to be comfortable again. Well done ASDA!
My lovely partner, who can fix virtually anything, wishes that he could fix this. But even WD40 and
Gaffa tape won’t work this time.
It’s a bit ‘chicken and egg’….. I thought I’d get the proper prosthetic first, and then go for a bra fitting.
But I need to take the bra for the prosthetic fitting. So, I browsed the brochures, and arranged a trip
to one of their fitters, for a supportive garment, accompanied by my supportive friend. This was the
first time I’d had a proper fitting, and like so many ladies, I am not the size I thought I was. What a
revelation! And what a lot of lovely undies and swimsuits are available.
So the 2nd operation day arrived- just an afternoon appointment this time. The surgeon was kind,
explaining that this is a quicker but more complicated operation, and nerves may be damaged. The
anesthetist was calming, and suggested imagining wine seeping up the canula.

All is well, then tea and toast, and home before dusk. My sister (retired pathologist) phoned. Her first question was
whether I can still wiggle my fingers. Yes!
Again I wait for the results. Another time of Blissful Ignorance – no point in worrying. So I keep
looking at the funny side – I’ve definitely got one of those!

Part 3:
Since I last wrote, both King Charles III and the Princess of Wales have joined the Cancer Community.
I certainly wish them well. I have now been told I am ‘cancer-free’ and hope that they will hear the
same uplifting news. 14 years ago, I had a little, benign lump removed, and I kept some of the
newspaper articles of the time, regarding cancer. I re-read them, and was amazed at the progress
and change of thought. Then, the view was that you may wish to remain in blissful ignorance, and
not even want to go for check-ups, as the treatment was sketchy. Now, there is so much more
likelihood of success if it’s found early. Though, staggeringly, 1 in 3 ladies invited for a mammogram
do not attend – what a waste of NHS time, and potential of catching cancer early.
At my first consultation, before surgery started, I was given a lovely little heart-shaped cushion, made
by someone at the Blandford Sewing School. I chose one without the spiky, frilly edging, which had
clearly been made with love, but not by someone with tender regions. It fits under the arm, or across
the chest, and has become my comfort blanket, helping when I have to compress the area, or
otherwise hug myself.
Following the second operation, I re-started the ‘Week 2’ Exercises. Trying to catch up, I stretched
forward, upward, sideways with vigour…. too much vigour, as I sprung a leak under my arm, of
seroma liquid. My lovely partner likened my distress to a punctured balloon hurtling round the room,
as I panicked and ran to the bathroom. Apparently, this is quite normal. So, much relieved, I’m back
to more gentle movements. I may have been too gentle, as the ‘stretching up the wall’ is OK, but the
‘arm lifts’ up and behind my head, show that I need to stretch further – otherwise I’ll have one arm
shorter than the other.
To hear that I am now cancer-free is fantastic! I will now be monitored for a few years, given bone
scans to check for osteoporosis, and continue to take hormone treatment for 7 years. My cancerous
tissue was sent to California for an Oncotype Test, which predicts the likelihood of cancer reappearing. Happily, results show that preventative Chemotherapy is not necessary, but Radiotherapy
might help, so I await another consultation to discuss the pros and cons.
I am so grateful to the NHS – particularly in Dorset where the testing, surgery, and care are brilliant.
My cancer was found early. Please, please take advantage of all the check-ups available. After age 71,
there are no further invitations, but you can request a mammogram every 3 years. 3 ladies have let
me know that they have now arranged for mammograms, and another has promised not to ignore
their reminder. I hope all are clear.
I have been lucky, and I hope that all of you, King Charles, and Princess Catherine will be lucky too